Nov.7

posted by on 2009.11.07, under all
07:

Only New York’s autumn reminds me of Beijing’s autumn.

Yesterday Yo-yo Ma and his silk road ensemble came to our school and did a “masterclass” on out-reach programs. That is to say, to give advice and suggestion on groups of musicians who are planning to go to elementary schools to spread the knowledge and joy of music. Aside from the fact that Yo-yo reminds me so much of my dad, he had reminded me certain things I tend to forget.

First and foremost: the importance of how we communicate to our audience. While it does not mean that we should do anything in our ability to please the sole taste of our audience, he did draw attention on the details of our physical presence, aura, energy and the like, and how we can use these things also to contribute to the communication of our ideas. This, kind of reminds me of Claudio Arrau’s comment in contrary. To paraphrase, “You had what you need to say, and that’s it. If the audience likes it, that’s alright; if not, *mumbles*.” The older generation seems to be concerned in the message itself, a pure and robust nature of their idea, and nothing more. Whereas the new generation of musicians seem to have started paying attention to the audience more, in turn seem more humanistic.

I won’t comment further on how I think regarding this matter. Simply, everybody is their own artist.

Secondly, Yo-yo pointed at the edge of the stage and said: here is the line we should always try to cross.

——

I have finally cleaned up the bathroom. Not completely, but nearly is enough. I feel very accomplished!

After watching the movie “Les Choirstes”, and after reading some reviews of the movie on wikipedia, I suddenly realized something about movie criticism – or art criticism in general – that such criticism is on the manipulation of human emotions. And this is huge for me!

Human emotions are the most intimate, personal and precious things that is given to a single person. To imagine that something/somebody can purposely manipulate that, is almost devilish. – But who am I to say? Do I not learn also – in ways – to do the same thing?

At least I hope I am learning to sharpen the lens with which I use to convey my ideas, instead of for the sake of manipulating emotions. (Yet – yet! – I have on occasions enjoyed doing so…)

——

My very good friend Rose will be in New York with me for a week. I am very excited to have her here.

One very last remark: pianist Michelangeli reminds me of the God Father from the movie God Father.

Siddhartha

posted by on 2009.10.11, under all
11:

I just finished reading “Siddhartha” by Hermann Hesse.

It is a book that speaks of Buddhist spirituality, but in a very representative German kind of existential way – to me at least.

It speaks of the teaching of benevolence, kindness, sympathy, etc., but of no love; for love binds everything and does not lead one to be free. But how can that be? How can humans live without love? Even though it can hurt us so much, it can agonize us so much, it can break us into piece, but shouldn’t we have the courage to fight through for love instead of drifting away into the loftiness of places without any human contact?

Many things I agree, yet I disagree.

Then again, I thought and wondered, if I hadn’t come out from China at the age of 13, what would I think about the world?

—-

Everything that is thought and expressed in words is one-sided, only half the truth; it all lacks totality, completeness, unity.

摘自 《克裏斯朵夫》- 卷十出版序

posted by on 2009.07.07, under all, 中文
07:

我寫下了快要消滅的一代的悲劇。我毫無隱蔽地暴露了它的缺陷與德性,它的沉重的悲哀,它的混混屯屯的驕傲,它的英勇的努力,和爲了重新締造一個世界,一種道德,一種美學,一種信仰,一個新的人類而感到的沮喪 – 這便是我們過去的歷史。

你們這些生在今日的人,你們這些年輕人 – 現在要輪到你們了!踏在我們的身体上面向前吧。但願你們比我們更偉大,更幸福。

我自己也和我過去的靈魂告別了;我把它當作空殼似的扔掉了。生命是連續不斷的死亡與復活。克裏斯朵夫,咱們一起死了預備再生吧!

——羅曼 羅蘭,一九一二年 十月

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